Have you ever been out on a run, be it a short tempo run or a weekly long run, and seen another runner and, before your better judgement could stop you, you found yourself immediately critiquing him or her? Maybe his stride was way too long, or she was committing spandex abuse and you just couldn't help but start picking him or her apart in your run-loving mind. I'll admit it. I'm guilty as charged. I mean, I am anything but the epitome of a model runner. My stride is way too short, I wear the same nasty running shorts and shirt over and over, and drag my feet more than I pick them up. Maybe it's from running alone so much on a crowded trail with plenty of food for thought from other runners, or maybe it just comes with the unwarranted arrogance of the many miles I have under my feet. Who knows. But, how easy it is to forget just how quirky ALL RUNNERS are. This sport, as a whole, really isn't as glamorous as Meb and Paula and Kara make it look as they glide through the streets, as sleep and fast as gazelles on the Serengeti. No, this sport, for the vast majority of us, is an ugly, unattractive, unglamorous affair of monumental proportions. And yes, that means you!
In honor of all those unglamorous runners out there, the ones who lace up their trainers and put in their mileage faithfully each day no matter if it's in yesterday's sweaty and stinky running clothes, let's take today to talk about all of those things that make us so unlike those elites who are headed to London this summer.
You Might Be A REAL Runner If...
1. Your Garmin is big enough to be used as a weapon as self-defense if you ever need it. It's the first one you bought, and you're not getting another until it's dead. And when it IS dead, you fully intend on buying this EXACT same model, even if you have to do it on the Black Market from some man named Guido in a back alley behind a dumpster. You're. That. Attached.
2. Your running shoes are the most important item in your wardrobe...all 5 pair of them. Racing flats, trail shoes or trainers, you know how many miles you've currently run in each of them, and you can tell from "how they feel" when they've reached that magic number and need to be replaced. Outside of your running shoes, you have two other pair of shoes in your closet...one black and one brown. And they're flats. Heels? Yeah. Right.
3. You eat burgers and fries and Taco Bell. Not all runners are super-crazed health nuts. It's perfectly fine to enjoy those guilty pleasures every once in a while as long as you do it in moderation. Organic peanut butter? Never gonna happen. Some things just aren't going to be compromised in this girl's life.
4. You never really feel like racing. If you have the motivation to go out and run every day for the pure joy of how it makes your body feel, YOU ROCK! Not everyone needs a looming race deadline to get his or her butt off the couch and work it.
5. You actually sleep in on the weekends instead of getting up before dawn to run. Rest is just as important as putting in those miles, so if you prefer to stay snug as a bug in a rug on the weekends, grabbing a few extra zzzz's, that doesn't mean you don't take your sport seriously. Who says that running before the sun comes up is somehow superior to running in mid-afternoon? Miles are miles, no matter when the are run, so if you want to watch those Saturday morning cartoons, by all means...do it! You'll be better rested and more excited to face the rigors of a strenuous workout if your body has had enough time to rest and recover properly.
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